sherriknits

Tonight Tyler’s big dream came true, we got to go see HSM3!  We were so concerned that it would be sold out so Kenny went and bought tickets this morning.  So did Rhianna and Kyle.  When we got there, we wondered who let in the other 3 people there watching, it was like our private party!  It was little Sweet Pea’s first movie, too!

I was kind of embarrassed that I didn’t know that it was illegal to take a picture of a movie in progress, Rhianna told me when I whipped out my camera.  Thankfully I didn’t get a good shot because I am a rule-follower and I’d probably have had to go turn myself in, LOL.

Anyway, we had a great time.

Ticket in hand…

After the movie (oh please tell me it’s ok to have a picture of the credits rolling!

Coming out of the theater.

What a great family!

We stopped for gas on the way home…got a 10 cent discount, too…who’d ever have thought this would seem cheap.

Awhile back, I totally copied someone else and made a video of Tyler.  Today it seems appropriate to share it.

You may recall at the beginning of the month I got to meet friends that I’ve only known online.  I took a picture of Rachel, and she is also a fan of HSM .  It didn’t work to email it to her so maybe they can see it here.  Go Rachel!

 While I was saving this post, Tyler was in the kitchen pacing and talking about HSM 4!

Tags: my life

Tomorrow is the last day of 31 for 21.  It has been an interesting month for me.  When I first started, I wasn’t going to be legalistic about making sure I posted every day.  To be honest, it never felt difficult to do a post and once or twice I almost forgot but one of my kids reminded me and I managed to get one done.

It was never really hard to come up with something to talk about because there are so many things in a day that give something to share.  My hope through this month always was to just show that life in our household is more normal than not.  On the other hand, I would be lying to say I realize it is different, too.  I’ve always tried to be as honest as I can about our lives and share the ups and downs but at the same time, I do try to look at the positive side…or get myself to that place.

I hope you’ve enjoyed getting to know the whole family…our kids have all been such a blessing.  I think the 3 older kids have shown that they realize they are different people because of the impact of Tyler in their lives.  Rebecca is still marveling that she doesn’t remember ever really being told about Tyler having Down Syndrome, it has always been a fact of her life.  Ben remembers but maybe didn’t really understand what it was all about.  Rhianna was old enough to know.

It was normal to the kids to have teachers and therapists coming to our house every week with buckets of toys.  Tyler’s first therapist, who we were blessed to have for 11 1/2 years, laughs to this day over how I made Ben and Rebecca sit on the couch with their hands folded while she worked with Tyler.  I was so scared, I guess, that they would get in the way…but she always brought fun things for them to do, too.  She had artwork from them for years on her refrigerator because she was like family to them.  I’m sure they thought every family had people come play like that.

I can’t even remember if I ever shared what it was like for us to find out we’d had a child with a disability.  Maybe it doesn’t matter so much right now.  I do know that our first conversations were about knowing God does not make mistakes.  We knew it, we truly believed it.  But I will be honest, Kenny and I walked through a lot of pain in the early days.  At odd times, we both would just break down crying.  At the same time, we experienced unspeakable joy over different things happening.  We learned what it was to smile on the outside and cry on the inside.  We know and understand the tears behind closed doors.  I remember many times talking about at the same moment experiencing huge sorrow and grief at the same time we felt incredible happiness.  It has been a good thing.

I was always the one who could not stand having attention called to myself and now I get to walk around with this little attention-getter.  That’s been good for me.  (although I still hate the attention).  We have been fortunate in never really having a bad experience, people usually are very kind and see the fun side of things.  We’ve had very few rude remarks from people and usually they are just out of ignorance.  It makes me cringe when I wonder how many thoughtless things I’ve said to other people in my own ignorance.

We’ve all learned to give others grace when they step on our toes that way.  We know people usually mean well.

We can’t really remember what life was like before we lived this life.  We have learned there are so many ways to walk it out and we’ve learned to be comfortable in the way we’ve chosen.  Along the way we have met very few who are like-minded but that’s ok.  We all need to give each other room to do what works for their own family.

We know that we are grateful for the built-in support system we have with our family.  Tyler will never have to worry about being taken care of because he is so loved by his siblings and extended family.  Rhianna has often said that she believes he may live with her at different times just to give us some space, whether that ever happens is not important to me, what is important that as an adult she says it and means it. 

Kenny and I are learning now to adjust to being “the three of us” as our kids have moved along in their lives.  Ben still lives with us but he is rarely here and will be married in less than a year.  This has been a difficult adjustment for us but we know God will always give us the grace to do it if we trust Him to. 

The first time we went away for a week together (the 3 of us), we were so exhausted from the 24/7 care and not being able to go for a little drive or walk together just the two of us.  But we’re getting used to it and it does no good to dwell on the difficulty.  I am convinced God knows the desire of our hearts and if we need time away, we have great kids who will care for Tyler so we can do it. 

What’s funny along that line is the first time we went away without Tyler (our 25th anniversary!) we spent 2 of the 3 days constantly worrying about who had hold of him or looking for him to make sure he wasn’t too close to the water or the edge of the cliff.  It was our first realization about how constant he is.  From that point, we started trying to take a weekend here and there because we realized it wasn’t healthy to never take a break from the constant stress.

We hope we didn’t and won’t impose too terribly much on our other kids.  We know we’ve made mistakes in that way…especially with Rebecca, who took the brunt of that…but we also hope they always know that we are so, so grateful and so, so proud of them.

I’m thankful for this challenge to do my part in bringing awareness to Down Syndrome in this month devoted to that.  Rebecca thought it would be fun to start a family blog that we all have access to so we can share things as they happen.  I think we might do that.  I want them to be able to share as well as their spouses.  We’ll let you know if we ever do get that going.

I also wanted to say that when we figure out how to get the “tv program” online that Kenny talked about on his post  we’ll share that.  It’s just been too busy to work on that although he edited it down and it’s ready to go.

I’ll end this post by saying thank you to my family.  Kenny, I couldn’t imagine trying to do this without you, I love you and am so grateful to walk through life by your side.  Rhianna, Benjamin, Rebecca…thank you for loving your brother with the intensity that you do and for being there for him and for us.  We’ve always been able to count on you and it’s been a joy to watch God shape your lives through your brother.  Kyle, Brittany, and Chase…you guys are incredible.  You have come into our family and have embraced Tyler as your own brother and we love you for it.  We couldn’t ask for more.  And to our extended family and all our friends who walk along side us, thank you…we couldn’t do it without you either. 

Whew, I think I’ll go cry some happy tears now.

Tags: my life

June 2000

All 4 of our kids have loved every opportunity to go to Grandma and Grandpa’s. They live on the Oregon coast exactly 4 hours from us. We used to get to go there a lot until the kids got older and were scattering every direction all the time. It would be nice if that would be something we could do more often now that it is pretty much just the 3 of us.

In these years, Rhianna didn’t get to go often with us any more so there aren’t any pictures today of her. Grandma and Grandpa live in the country and the kids loved running and playing there. These disks didn’t have any of the swing but our kids have all spent hours and hours swinging under the big tree.

Good memories.

Tags: my life

Tags: my life

This is probably going to be long just because I haven’t posted any current pictures.

I got a visit last week from a little black kitty.

Can’t get any cuter than that!

The next afternoon, got a visit from two cuties.  Uncle Tyler was helping guard little miss Sweet Pea in her new Bumbo chair.  She has on a onsie that belonged to her mommy.

That night, she and mom went on a date night with us since her daddy was out of town.

That was fun!

Yesterday at church, we had a little handknit girl.  The first picture I took was really better but silly me had it on video rather than still so we have to settle for the lesser of the two pictures.

The sweater came from Hasbu, isn’t it cute!  The leggings were knit by a blogless knitting friend, Amber.  I LOVED them both on her!  She was so snuggy warm and was quite the hit!

However, I digress.  Are you wondering about the title?  Well, I have mentioned several times about the current obsession of collecting song sheets of the worship songs. 

This morning, we had to get up early to head up to Olympia for therapy.  I was not fully awake and I was trying to step over a pile of hot wheels surrounded by song sheets.  I have no idea what happened but the next thing I knew, I was on the floor with my leg twisted behind me.  I’m thinking my foot must have slipped out from under me, but honestly…I could not even figure it out.

Now, I know it could have been a lot worse, but let me tell you..this HURT!  My knee is also skinned and I spent the rest of the day hobbling around.  Stairs are not fun and I found out I cannot lead down the stairs with my right foot, the injury was on my left. 

Hubby was waking up Tyler and thought the dog fell off the bed until he was coming down the stairs and heard me crying.  lol 

We had two appointments today and got to go for lunch in between.

That’s Red Robin up there behind the trees.  It was a beautiful day today.

It was a fun lunch!

The drive to therapy was so beautiful.

We haven’t been to therapy since early summer so it was all fun and new again.

 

We went outside a little bit, too.

Tonight I had a meeting at the church and I just thought it was so beautiful outside I needed to take a picture. The tree in the lower right is really meaningful to us, it was planted in honor of a pastor who passed away about 10 years ago. 

It was a horribly busy day, so much for a day off! I got to leave my meeting early or this would have been a very short post.

And now I am going to kick up my feet and rest. 

Tags: my life

Another look at the past.  This is a month after the visit to the police station. 

A big thing in our household is birthday breakfast.  Tyler has always looked forward to it with eager anticipation.  We’ve always tried to catch him coming down the stairs half asleep.

He was so tiny. 

He had to stand on his chair to look at his gifts. 

I think that year we were pretty in to gross motor skills (actually, I wonder if that will ever end) but not only had he gotten his bike but we also bought him a scooter.  Yes, he always wore the helmet on that one, too.

Tags: my life

Before I do the 31 for 21…I wanted to show you what a nut big brother is.  You read his post yesterday about his brother, but I can’t miss the opportunity to show you what a nut he is in his own rite.

BenFuegoCommercial from Sherri Knits on Vimeo.

He was on a mission trip to Mexico when he did this….he totally adlibs as he goes. 

(video courtesy of his good friend)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and now we visit the police station in June 2000. 

After we got the new bike, we needed a helmet.  Someone must have told us to take him to the police station to get him fitted for a helmet.  What a fun time he had!

Rhianna took him.

Oh wow, this is fun!

It fits!

Thanks, guys, it was fun!

A few years later when he started wandering from home, he got a ride in a police car when he let the dog out and decided to catch him by himself.  We were on the run within 5-8 min. as near as we can tell, but he managed to get 8 blocks away… downtown…had crossed 2 very busy streets as well as many others, someone noticed something didn’t look right and followed him the last block and got him into a pizza parlor and called the police.  Hubby had gotten in the car and every person he saw and asked if they’d seen him casually said…yes, saw him headed that way .. and continued working in their yards.  We were one step from falling apart!  I will forever be grateful to that anonymous person who stepped in to help out. 

The police were searching for frantic parents and when hubby saw a police car, he threw down his cell phone (I was talking to him) and hollered to ask him if he’d seen a boy and a dog.  The policeman turned to the passenger seat and said, “Have I seen a boy and a dog?”  Hubby heard this little voice say, “Yes!”  I heard him yell, they’ve got him and I fell apart on the street bawling my head off. 

It was after this that we discovered that we could get him a bracelet like they put on alzheimer patients from the agency on aging and it has numbers on it.  Wherever we go, they can call the number on it and find out exactly who he is and who to contact.  The kids all ended up with cell phones after that (a perk for having a brother like theirs) and the police have all of the numbers.

Another thing we tried for awhile was a $400 watch that had a tracking device in it.  We were supposed to be able to track him but unfortunately the phone service they used was not a good option for us here.

At least the police knew him and so do many, many people in a huge radius from our house.  Everyone knows that he should never be seen alone and we continue to be vigilant about that.

Ahhh, the memories!

Tags: my life

I was about 6 when Tyler was born. I remember Dad explaining to Becca and me that he had Down Syndrome. At the time I didn’t really know anything about that sort of thing, or how different it was from someone who did not have Down’ Syndrome. I think that if I ever had the choice to change it I probably would not. Tyler has been a great joy throughout the years. More recently he has started really enjoying a lot of the same sorts of movies that I like, so it gives us something in common. He likes to go to the theatre with Brittany and me whenever there is one of “our” kind of movies out… things like Spider-Man, Incredible Hulk, or Narnia. Basically if it is anything nerdy, we will both like it. Luckily Brittany likes that stuff too, because she has to come with us! He likes to sit in between us if he can, a few times he has succeeded in being in the middle seat. He has even given himself and me alter egos of his favorite characters. He is Spider-Man, Iron Man, and The Incredible Hulk.. while I get to be Superman, Batman, Wolverine, and The Punisher. Brittany is always just “the girl”. In fact, when I made this picture below he didn’t care for it because I am Superman, not him: This is us last year when we went to go see Spider-Man 3: Here he is pretending to be Optimus Prime in Transformers:

When he first met Brittany he liked her a lot… he thought she was his girlfriend! He also didn’t know what her last name was C****, so he always just called her Brittany H****. It went in line with the rest of the family: Mom H***, Dad H****, Ben H**** etc., then Brittany would say, “What about me?” and he would shrug and say, “Brittany H****”. As you have seen in one of my mom’s previous posts with Tyler getting his haircut, Brittany and him have become good friends. Now that Brittany and I are getting married Brittany really will be Brittany H****. This is strange to him, because when Rhianna and Rebecca both got married to their husbands they had their names change. Now that I am getting married, naturally, my name should change too! He didn’t quite understand it at first that because I am the guy my name stays the same and Brittany’s changes to ours. He’s figured it out by now though! He, and Brittany and I as well, are all excited for when the two of us have a house so he can come visit and do all the things we all three have in common. A few days ago Rebecca had a post that had pictures of Tyler that he had taken of himself one time on her camera. One time he did the same thing on my camera: One of my favorite things about him is all the phrases that he has and that all of us in the family can quote it and the rest of us know what we’re talking about. “Sure is,” “I knew that,” “You’re fired!” “1, 2, 3 Tickle!” and of course… “Dad’s bottom!” The last one has been an inside joke in the family for a very long time, and probably won’t be forgotten for a while. It’s funny how some things stick. Brittany always tells me that she thinks it’s great to have him around all the time because he keeps the family young. He really does too! Everyday he does goofy things that we all laugh at; he has such a great sense of humor and it’s always a blessing! God really picked the right family for him, we love him a lot and he loves us and we mesh perfectly!

Tags: my life

I had a heck of a time getting pictures off the old floppy disks to my old laptop (I really used to think that thing was so cool and I thought the old Sony Mavica was, too.)  I managed to get a few pictures before the old laptop crashed.  I can see this may be a lifetime job of getting our old pictures recovered, maybe I’ll teach Tyler to do it.  lol

Anyway….let’s go back (no comments, please, on the picture quality, this camera was really happening in those days!)

For his birthday one year, we bought him a real drum set, his size!  He entertained us with that for years until he started dismantling it on his own and moving it from room to room or using it for his cars or whatever..

This picture was evidently taken at Christmas the same year.

I had the dates when I was on the old laptop but they didn’t come along for the ride when I got them onto a flash drive, onto my computer, into Picasa and then over to Flickr.  I think these were in 2001.

Then I think these were in March of 2000.  We went bike shopping with his therapist and then got some huge training wheels to make the bike like a 4 wheeler.  You can imagine his delight when we walked in the bike shop!

This wasn’t the one he ended up with but evidently he really liked this one!

I really like this one, guys!

We spent hours at the store….it is like walking back into time.  Next door was a “department store” that just went out of business last year.  You would never believe what could be found in there.  We walked over there after the bike shopping and in the women’s department, we found those old satin robes that were quilted and brought back visions of big curlers and those net things we’d put in our hair to cover them.  The robes were covered in plastic bags.  We were dying of laughter. You would never believe the ancient stock in there…the community was pretty sad when they went out of business.  I know a lot of young people who loved to go there for vintage clothes.  The businesses were owned by two brothers.

Moving along…I also found some vacation pictures.

I can’t remember where this is but I thought it was cute.

Must have been something really interesting down there.

This vacation was around the time he was wandering away.  Every single day before we did anything, we’d take his picture so we would remember exactly what he was wearing.  It’s funny now, but it wasn’t funny at all then.  One of the mornings, he did escape and our family was frantically covering the RV park.  The park owner and I headed directly for the water and we saw this little fellow sitting at water’s edge, throwing rocks in.  I was about to fall apart, but really…he’d never get in water without a LOT of coaxing.  That period of time was incredibly stressful for us all and we had no idea how he managed to get out but let me tell you, it didn’t happen again.  It’s a wonder we all didn’t end up on meds during that time.  lol

I’ll try to find a few more pictures before this is all over.  I also know that the big brother is going to do a guest post, too, so stay tuned.

Tags: my life

I was 4 years old when Tyler was born. So I haven’t really ever known what life was like without him. I don’t have anything to compare it to and I don’t even remember when I actually understood what down syndrome is and that Tyler has it. But I do know that he has changed my life and the way I see things. It has been so fun watching him grow up to become such a gentleman. Whenever we go to the grocery store he always carries as many bags as he can for me. When we get home from the store I usually I grab a bag or two and go to unlock the door, and by the time I get back outside he’ll have everything in his hands with the trunk shut and everything. And he loves doing little jobs like getting the mail and helping me vacuum. Usually he’s willing to help whenever he can! Today we were at UPX and Jim asked him if he could go to the UPS truck and get a box full of peanut’s for him and he was thrilled to help! (sorry the picture quality isn’t the best, it’s from my phone)

This is his favorite place in my house. He could (and sometimes does) spend hours sitting here with a whiteboard writing things or just listening to music. And when he listens to music he sings along very loudly.

I spend at least three afternoons a week with him and we have a lot of fun together. I can’t say that I haven’t ever had my bad days with him, but I’ve had many more good days than I have had bad. Tyler has been such a joy to grow up with, he never fails to make me laugh. Sometimes it makes me upset when people talk about  special needs as a negative thing, because Tyler has only ever been a blessing to me. I’m proud to have him as my little brother and I’m very thankful for him.

ps from me….Rebecca wanted a picture of her and Chase and Tyler together, this one is a few years old.

Tags: my life